Howdy, folks, and welcome back! Last time, on Attack of the Saiyans, Piccolo went and found Gohan in the wilderness, where they then beat up a dragon. Today, we're popping back to Goku, so let's head out.



Someone was concerned we weren't going to get any Snake Way action in this game.



I'm here to tell you that we're about to Snake the fuck out of some Ways.



It's a little hard to tell, but there is a line of spirits on the left there, heading into the check-in station.



And there are ogre guys around here, directing soul-traffic and doing other stuff. They're kind of like city employees, but for the afterlife.





Bitch, please, I'm Goku. Kami brought me here.



He explains the situation to the big dude in front of us.



King Yemma is the big boss around here and determines who goes to Heaven and who goes to Hell. He's also King of the Ogres.



And, uh, really big. Ox-King is big, but this dude is fucking gigantic.



: But are you saying...You would allow someone who is Heaven-bound to make the dangerous journey across Snake Way to see King Kai?

: Yes.



I'm posting this screenshot to mention that Goku now has a halo, both in this portraiture and in his on-field sprite. I could make a new set of portraits for him to reflect this, but...Well, fuck that.



And Kami agrees with me, so there's that.



: Well, you were an alien, too, right? All who perish come here and are judged and then sent to Heaven or Hell...

: Did someone called Raditz come through here?

: Hmm?

: Goku...! Be careful not to be rude!

: Yeah, he did. Your brother, right? Naturally, I sent him to Hell...

: Did he fight back?

: That he did. He fought, but I took care of him.



Raditz, while being kind of cool, is also a bit of a dipstick. But he got his ass kicked by King Yemma, so it all evens out.



However, this is an interesting thought...



: Keep your voice down! You shouldn't talk that way in front of King Yemma! King Kai is even stronger anyway.





HE HEARD THAT KAMI OH GOD WE'RE ALL FUCKED



Oh, it's just Kami that's fucked. 



: What superb hearing you have...

: ...Don't worry. I was just joking. All right! If you want to go that bad, I will allow you passage.

: Oh, thank you, King Yemma!

: I'll call a guide. Go out that way and wait. But so you know, if you fall off Snake Way, no one can help you.

: Farewell, Goku...Don't give up. This will be a hard year.

: Well, I don't really understand it all, but I'll be back. Thanks! Tell Mr. Popo I said "Hi"!



And then, Kami monologues internally...

: This just might be too close to call...Even if we were to ask Shenron to destroy the Saiyans...He might not be able to stand up to such power...Now we must wait for Goku to train under King Kai...And see just how much stronger he can become...Goku's son, Gohan, is our only other hope...I must keep an eye on his development.

Let's never mind that Shenron can't kill people through his wishes and just scoot.



Yeah, yeah, yeah, we're moving, Yemma.



Well, Kami is pooping his man-dress, but we're moving.



We're given control, so we can chat with Yemz again. Apparently he's cool with Goku, and just really wanted Kami out of his damned office.







There's two bits of treasure around here, with this being the first; it reduces Ki costs by a small amount.





While this gives you a chance to revive when you run out of HP. A little too unpredictable for my tastes, but it sells for 5,000z, which I like much better.





And so, we're taken out to Snake Way.



Snake Way isn't just a cool name, either.



: Well...I died, so I don't think I am really...What's King Kai like anyway?



PIctured here is a statement of bullshit. King Kai is a cool dude, but that's about it.



This is the entrance to Snake Way.



: Wow! So...This is Snake Way, huh?! Now what?

: All you have to do is follow the road and it will lead you to where King Kai resides.

: Looks pretty long...



Just so that you can see that it actually says 600,000 miles. Or nearly 1,000,000 kilometers, for those of you who don't use the mile system.



: In the last ten million years, I believe only King Yemma has made the journey...

: That big guy? Well, as long as someone has made it before, I might have a chance...

: Make sure you are careful not to fall into the clouds. Hell lies below and you will never be able to come back.

: Oh, OK.

: I really should have brought something to eat...

: Nothing to worry about. Since you are no longer living, there should be no chance of you dying of hunger.

: Oh...

: Oh yeah! I've got a favor I wanna ask. Do you know Baba?

: Well, yes, She visits on occasion...

: Great! Next time you see her, tell her to tell Master Roshi to wait a year to bring me back!

: All right. So wait one year...Master Roshi...

: Well, here goes nothing! So, I just have to be careful not to fall off, right?

: Yes, that's right.



Well, that oughta make the trip a bit quicker.



In all fairness, Mr. Ogre, we could have beaten you up and taken your car to do this trip.

No, wait, we couldn't have. Goku hasn't learned to drive yet and that filler episode is waaaay off.



And we're walking on Snake Way, despite Goku just saying he was going to fly.





For now, there is nothing of interest going on. We're just taking our 600,000 mile trip, without having to worry about encounters or hidden paths.



Ooh, a street-sweeper!







He's doing his fucking job, Goku! Something you're not familiar with, you lazy bum! 



: Oh, really? Well, I'm off to see King Kai!

: Huh?! King Kai? Never heard of anyone trying to do such a crazy thing!

: Is it still a ways to go?



Impossible, good sir, but I like your optimism.





Goku, c'mon, man, be happy that you went 150,000 miles. I'd say that's pretty good progress. Unless it took you a quarter of a year to go that far...



Also, Goku is up to some shenanigans.





Alright, taking advantage of civil servants while they're busting their asses!





And so, Goku hops on the back of the street sweeper and proceeds to take a nap.





Goku is dreaming about his training, about beating up dudes and punching bad guys. Or something.



At this point, the screen begins shaking madly.



Which Goku doesn't seem to notice, as he's flung off the Way and into the clouds.





Thankfully, he woke up in time to not land on his head. Though, he may very well have broken his legs.





Welcome to the Home For Infinite Losers, Goku!



Oh, right, this is Hell now. Originally, in the English dub, since words like "Hell" couldn't be used, they had to be creative.



And thus, the greatest name for the shitty version of the afterlife was born, and bad people went to HFIL.





Suddenly, these two gym rat ogres show up, unhappy we're trying to get some of that fruit!



The fruit of the Yemma Tree, the Ensenji, is pretty powerful stuff. Not only does eating a piece of it make it so you don't require nourishment for three months, but it'll also fully heal you, as well as restoring and doubling your energy and strength. Or so says the Dragon Ball Wiki.



Spoilers; we're going to eat some.



: Only King Yemma is allowed to partake of the fruit...

: Well...Hah hah...I was just so hungry...

: You were hungry?! What kind of excuse is that...? Just who are you, anyway?

: What are you doing here?

: ...I'm Goku! I came for special training...So, which one of you is King Kai?

: ...King Kai??

: You guys aren't King Kai?



Is it just me, or if there was a (good) live action Dragon Ball movie, would Stephen Colbert be perfect for Mez?





Also, there is a lot to Hell, apparently. This Area and Sector are all we ever see of it, as far as I know.



: What?! This is Hell?? That means I must have fallen off Snake Way!

: ...What're you doing?

: ...Me? I wanna get back to Snake Way!

: You wanna get back that badly? I'm the second strongest ogre next to King Yemma!

: I heard King Yemma was really strong...Must not be as strong as I thought...

: Hah hah hah! How about finding out for yourself?

: I don't have the time...

: If you win, I'll arrange it so you get back to Snake Way!

: Really?!?!



Well, Goz, I'd reckon when we finish up, you'd rather have your tongue taken out.



However, what if we lose?



We'll still be revived through the Dragon Balls, right? Is that really that bad of a situation? Besides...



Goku knows he's the baddest motherfucker in Hell. 





And we're back to having control. Hey, what if we snag a piece of that fruit...



Oh, right, we can't. Even though those two couldn't stop us before we snagged it and starting getting our grub on.



Well, let's get this show on the road.



As ready as I'll ever be.



So, Goz is...Counted as a boss.



At 2200 HP, he doesn't have the staying power needed to hang with Goku.



Even if he does have a knock-off Hundred Hand Slap.



In this fight, as long as you're able to hit your Guards, smash away at him with your strongest attacks and he'll fall pretty easily.





He has a couple different attacks, like this one, where he hits the ground a few times with his club.



It can inflict Stun, so be on the lookout for this; if your health gets too low and he Stuns you, he'll just beat you to death before you get a good chance to heal up. He also has a variant of this attack that hits the ground once for big damage; I don't remember if it can Stun or not.



Well, that's nearly half of his health in two hits. Goku is pretty much our strongest fighter.





To help enhance the feeling that this is actually a sumo match, Goz can also stomp around like they do. Or like I guess they do, as my biggest exposure to Sumo wrestling is Yokozuna, of the WWF, and that scene with Fat Bastard from Goldmember.



It has the effect of raising his Attack, which could be troubling. Goz hits pretty hard, but his lower HP and the fact that Goku is faster won't do him any favors.



Let's finish this off with Goku's newest attack, the Energy Wave Combo. It'll hit all enemies on screen, but if there's just one, it'll just focus fire on that lone schmuck.



It's just a series of energy shots, which can be very handy for groups.





Not a bad few rewards for taking him out, considering we also make 800z.



Mez isn't amused by Goz getting his ass handed to him.



And Goku is now bored with it. Not that I blame him, since that boss fight video is barely over a minute. Hell, I think it might take you longer to read my commentary on it than to watch the video itself. Something about that seems a bit off...



: ...You wanna get back up on Snake Way, right? In that case, I've got a good idea!

: Really? Tell me!

: It's a secret passage that no one knows about...

: Mez! We can't tell him about that!

: Tell me!! Please!!

: ...Only on one condition!

: Condition?

: I'm gonna set off running...If you can catch me, I'll tell you about the secret passage...

: Like tag?

: That's right! But this time it's no ordinary game!! We'll get started once you're ready!



That won't be until next update, but let's take this moment to head north of our current position.



As there's a store right here. We need to hit the window on the right to actually buy anything, though.



There are the elemental attack accessories, changing the element of your attack to either Fire, Thunder or Ice. I might check into buying one of each; they could come in handy.



The only new item for sale is the Shenron Scale, which will immediately max out someone's Rage Gauge. They can definitely come in handy, but we'll find a few, and I never really feel like it's necessary to buy them.



Anyways, let's rest up, so we can chase Mez around Hell and maybe get out of here.

But that's next time, so stay tuned!